No Fear of Bad News

"Surely the righteous will never be shaken;  they will be remembered forever. They will have no fear of bad news;  their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the LORD.  Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear; in the end they will look in triumph on their foes." - Psalm 112: 6-8 

Fear is so disorienting sometimes. I have a wandering mind that through so many years has been filled with the fear of bad news, literally. I used to fear death of myself or someone close to me. I used to play it out in my head how it would be, how I would feel, or how others would feel. I can blame this on watching Unsolved Mysteries as a kid or on the fact that I have had a lot of post-traumatic stress in my life, or I can simply see it for what it is - Spiritual Warfare. You may not believe in Spiritual Warfare, but it happens to you every day and it is everywhere. My mother-in-law sent me this verse and it is so perfect to reflect and meditate upon.

We were created for God and to believe in God, but we now live in a very fallen, corrupt world and Satan will do anything to keep us as far away from God as possible. Lately I have just thought about the fact that there is this baby growing inside me, something I have dreamed of and wanted so bad, and when I think about this I have this overwhelming amount of joy that comes upon me and I just cannot help but thank Jesus every time. 

Then it will happen, I will just be sitting there, and thoughts of things happening to the baby will fill my mind. I will stop the thoughts and pray. It is all I can do. Some people say to be realistic and keep in mind that there is this possibility that all of this may never happen. But then I think, what is the point of thinking that way? How is that benefiting me or the baby. I think God would want me to bring hope to this baby, not fear. Hope is the only thing in this world stronger than fear. So that is how we try to think and that is how we pray. God is the God of hope, joy, love, faith, grace, justice, peace, etc... 

Well this morning was a tough on for me, since I woke up to 30 degree weather and had to walk Dylan. I am not good with the cold. It pierces through me like a sword, it dries my skin out very fast and dries my eyes out to the point of watering. It makes me feel like I have no energy. But I have to do what I have to do, and it is not that bad. I just got a bit worried that if I was feeling tired and cold and just awful then so was the baby. I know this is a complete lie and I know it, but man those thoughts can attack you at every point. All I can do is ask that God gives the baby what he or she needs right now and that I just trust in that.

Please pray for the baby. Please pray that the baby is healthy, growing, and has plenty of oxygen that he or she needs. Please pray for peace for Matt and I and that we will get through our time away. Pray for energy and strength in the mornings when I have to walk Dylan. Also please pray that it would be possible that I could find a gym with a pool that we can afford. I love swimming and would be the perfect low impact exercise for me right now.