Waiting is Tough to do

"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer." ~ Romans 12:12

I was searching for versus on patience this morning, as I have had to have a lot of it in my life, as well as right now. It seems I struggle a lot with control and wanting to have it and make my own plans work. Well they don't always work because God's plan is better. I have to keep reminding myself about that because when I see small obstacles I go back to thinking that this is somehow not true or is not going to happen. 

Life has gotten really busy and I just haven't had time to write. I also wanted something significant to be there when I do write. But the last few months have been a lot of waiting. I went for the CT Scan and the results were never sent. After 5-6 weeks they finally got to UCLA. Then of course they had to wait until the ACHD tam could meet with the surgeon to go over the findings. 

Over all they were fine, but they found two problems that need further investigation. One was that I had an infection in my lungs. At the time of the CT scan I had a terrible cough that was lasting a long time. I am terrible at seeking medical attention, so I just put it off. Hopefully the infection has gone away, but I have to go to a lung specialist to get further information. That has to be cleared up before they will even proceed. 

Then they also found that the CT Scan showed that the artery to my right lunch looked very small. They will need a closer look at the dimensions to determine the valve that needs to go in. This requires a cardiac catheterization. If you don't know what it is, they put a tube with a camera up a main artery to your heart and take videos and pictures. They can also do procedure this way, which is pretty incredible. The Cath takes about an hour and then I leave the same day. It does cause soreness and bruising for a while after, but nothing I cannot handle. Unfortunately it has to be done at UCLA, so another trip we did not plan for is something we have to account for. 

There is a lot going on and I know I am taking this trip for the Cath and one to Nebraska without Matt around, so that is tough. I do know that God is faithful and we will be ok. 

I want to terminate these thoughts in my head that tell me things still are not possible. Those are lies and I have to focus on the very simple words of the verse above. Rejoice in Hope...... I need to be hopeful and rejoice in that. Be Patient in tribulation. Everyone has a different definition of tribulation, but God is calling me to be patient. Then be Constant in Prayer. I have to admit, I have not been constant. I have not prayed with great faith and I have not done this consistently. 

I am working on being more faithful and listening to the still voice of God who will ultimately give me peace. He has been so good to us and is bringing us through so many wonderful and exciting things, that we just have to keep our eyes focused on Him and His plan for us. 

Thank you for reading. I would love prayer for things to keep proceeding smoothly.